


Peculiar Teleology

by DoctorV



Series: Archive: Doc's Old-Ass Comics Fic (DC, JLU, etc.) [15]
Category: Blue Beetle (Comics), Booster Gold (Comics), DC Elseworlds, DCU, DCU - Comicverse, Justice League, Justice League International (Comic)
Genre: Booster Does Not Appreciate The Universe's Sense Of Humor, Heartbreak, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Past Infidelity, Reconciliation, Ted Needs To Remember That People Aren't Science Experiments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-27
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2019-04-03 23:15:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14006964
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoctorV/pseuds/DoctorV
Summary: The universe conspires to keep reminding Booster of what he's lost.





	Peculiar Teleology

**Author's Note:**

> Archiving some old old OLD fanfic of mine. This was originally posted to LiveJournal 12/29/2005, with the author's note:  
> "Because eliyes accidentally-without-meaning-to dared me to fix the mess I'd left them in, and because I already had it mostly planned out anyway. So...is this fixed enough?  
> Title is from the quote, by Alfred Adler: "Every individual acts and suffers in accordance with his **peculiar teleology** , which has all the inevitability of fate, so long as he does not understand it." It was one of those happy accidents finding the quote."
> 
> Some dialogue, near the end, is taken from...I believe _JLI Vol. 1 #17_ , when Booster and Beetle are indeed stuck in a Bialyan prison together.
> 
> [All other entries in this series have been backdated to their original posting date.]

Booster Gold knew a lot about time. Not as much as he probably should have under the circumstances, but still significantly more than the average Joe.

 

In his opinion, it was a load of crap that time healed all wounds.

 

Time and distance, _maybe_. But the funny thing about being a superhero was that he tended to socialize with other superheroes. Entirely without even meaning to, Booster could easily go a full week and have only talked to people who kept a pair of primary colored tights in their closet.

 

And as luck would have it, the new Blue Beetle was also a superhero.

 

The new Blue Beetle, who under the bug-eyed yellow goggles and form-fitting blue suit was Booster's time-displaced former lover, Ted Kord.

 

The new Blue Beetle, who had taken the name in order to honor the memory of his idol, the previous Blue Beetle, Dan Garrett.

 

Dan Garrett, the man who stole Ted from him twice. One of those times posthumously.

 

It seemed to be some sort of cruel, unspoken rule of the universe that when Booster wanted to avoid someone, he would immediately and unrelentingly be put in close proximity to that person.

 

In the instances where they were part of a large group of heroes, they could usually manage some amount of distance. Inevitably, they would at some point meet each others eyes, stare for a few heart-stopping moments, then quickly look away and try to pretend nothing had happened. If they were lucky, that would be all. If not, they would end up having to work together, though no amount of persuasion would convince them to drop the uncomfortable, monosyllabic communication they used in those times.

 

It wasn't perfect, in fact it was occasionally very inconvenient, but it was something they could both live with. Apparently.

 

That didn't mean Booster had to like it.

 

* * *

 

"...Booster."

 

"Ted."

 

"Blue Beetle.

 

"... _Fine_."

 

"Booster—"

 

"I have to _go_ , Beetle."

 

"Wai—"

 

" _Goodbye_."

 

"...Dammit."

 

* * *

 

When he found out that Blue Beetle had been injured during a fight and fallen into a coma, Booster had to be restrained by Superman while Batman sedated him. Booster went under cursing everything Bat.

 

Booster woke up with a headache and cottony discomfort in his mouth. He was in the Watchtower medical bay and when he turned his head he could see a bandage-covered Ted in the next bed over.

 

What he didn't understand was why the man had suddenly gone so blurry. Or why his eyes stung.

 

Looking at Ted now, Booster had trouble calling to mind the image that had haunted and plagued him since they parted ways. The image of Blue Beetle with his cowl off, Ted with his goggles hanging from his neck, lips locked together while Booster stared in horror from the doorway, acid churning sickeningly in his stomach.

 

Now all he saw was Ted with tubes and wires weaving through and around him.

 

Without any conscious thought, Booster stood on unsteady legs and made his way toward the unconscious man. Staring at Ted as he sat down, Booster felt his heart clenching in a depressingly familiar way.

 

Ted wasn't as blurry now, but Booster's eyes still stung and his cheeks felt wet. Leaning forward with his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped in front of him, Booster decided that time didn't heal a damn thing. Time was a heartless bitch and was in cahoots with the sadistic entity that was the universe.

 

"Selfish bastard," Booster whispered, reaching out an index finger and gently stroking the unbandaged side of Ted's face. "How am I supposed to hold a grudge when you're like this? Get better so I can be mad at you again. ...Being mad doesn't hurt as much."

 

* * *

 

When Blue Beetle regained consciousness, Booster quietly slipped out and let someone know. He didn't come back the whole time Blue Beetle was recovering.

 

Ted didn't find out until someone later remarked on how sweet Booster's bedside vigil had been.

 

* * *

 

Booster was sure that somewhere, somewhen, somehow...there was a god laughing at him. Maybe one of Wonder Woman's, maybe one of the ones from New Genesis or Apokolips, maybe one of J'onn's obscure Martian gods, or maybe even one from a pantheon Booster wasn't familiar with.

 

Whatever the case, they were out there and they were having a grand ol' _bwa-ha-ha_ with Time and the Universe at his expense.

 

Booster was trapped in a Bialyan prison. The punchline was that he was sharing a cell with a scruffy, half-naked Blue Beetle. Or Ted Kord, since Booster had trouble thinking of him as Blue Beetle without the suit.

 

The icing on that punchline was that Ted seemed to want to talk.

 

Leaning his forehead against the bars of the cell, Booster sighed and rubbed the side of his neck. The situation was getting to him, he was mixing his metaphors.

 

"Booster—"

 

" _What_ , Te—Beetle? What? Do you have some brilliant escape plan?"

 

"Well no—"

 

"Then why are you talking to me?"

 

"Because I _should've_ talked to you ages ago!" Ted snapped irritably, getting to his feet. "I should've talked to you after you—"

 

"Caught you?" Booster glared at him over his shoulder. He felt perversely pleased when Ted seemed to deflate.

 

"It wouldn't have been a problem if you hadn't showed up then," Ted muttered.

 

Booster stared at him in disbelief. "Are you saying it's _my_ fault?!"

 

"Yes! No. Maybe—I don't know!" Ted ran a hand through his hair as he collected his thoughts. "I...that was the first time. The _only_ time. I thought...."

 

Narrowing his eyes, Booster turned and leaned his back against the bars. Ted sat on his cot, forearms resting on his knees, staring down at his hands. "I needed to know...if it was just _you_."

 

"Just me what?"

 

Ted sighed and raised his hands to rest his chin on them. "It's not true what they said, you know. I wasn't some yokel caught up in a whirlwind of futuristic charisma. But you're still.... You're very _shiny_ , Booster."

 

"Shiny."

 

"It's the best word I can think of at the moment. Give me a break, I'm not at my best here. Just...go with it."

 

"Fine, I'm shiny. So what?"

 

"Look, I...I'm not very experienced, okay?" Ted ducked his head, but Booster could still see his blush. "I wasn't exactly a virgin when we met, but...I was just always so busy. Building things, inventing things, figuring out how things worked. It just seemed like a waste of time to go out and try to meet someone, and then get to know them, and then _maybe_ get lucky when it was faster and easier to stay home and take care of things myself." He paused for a moment, then looked up, meeting Booster's eyes. "And then you came along.

 

"I never considered myself lonely, Booster. Never. I had my work, I didn't need anything else. Any _one_ else. When I met you...I...." Ted smiled wryly. "You had to suspect I was attracted to you at first because you were...well, you were _like_ work, but better because you were also a person."

 

Booster returned the smile despite himself. He had suspected something like that when they first met. That Ted saw him as a sort of advanced science experiment. But as long as it got Booster laid, he wasn't going to complain. It had even seemed a little kinky sometimes. "Yeah."

 

"You were the first man I ever kissed, Booster," Ted said quietly, solemnly. "Until Dan, you were the _only_ man I ever kissed."

 

Booster's expression was pinched as he stared down at his crossed arms.

 

"I...I'm not exactly proud of myself, but...I had to know, and Dan... _he_ kissed _me_ and I...." Ted stared down at the bare cement floor. "I used him. I didn't mean to. I didn't realize...didn't realize how much he cared."

 

" _Used_ him? Ted, I don't—"

 

"I wanted to know if I would feel the same for someone else as I felt for you," Ted blurted, looking up again. "I...I wanted to be sure that it wasn't just your...your _shine_."

 

"What, so Dan was shiny too?"

 

Ted groaned and buried his face in his hands. " _No._ It was all _very_ scientific and logical in my head at the time. Dan was the _control_ in an experiment to see if what I felt for you was different, _special_ , from what I would feel for someone else, _anyone_ else. Dan was willing, so I used him. And then you walked in and I saw the look on your face and I realized that _people_ aren't scientific or logical most of the time and you probably wouldn't...see it as an experiment."

 

Booster stared at him for a moment. He would be the first to admit that he wasn't exactly Mr. Science, but what Ted was saying almost made sense. _Almost._

 

"So if you were just using him, then why...why all of _this_?" Booster asked, waving his hand at Ted. The meaning of the gesture was lost since Ted wasn't wearing his Blue Beetle getup, but because he was Ted he got it.

 

"...Guilt," Ted said sadly.

 

" _Guilt_?"

 

"I told you I used him, Booster," Ted sighed. He laid back on his cot, one hand under his head, the other resting on his abdomen. "And I said I didn't realize how much he cared. I _didn't_. Dan was... Dan was a great guy. I considered him a good friend. I liked him, I respected him, I admired him. And...he didn't treat me like a lot of other people did. I mean, he knew who—what— He knew where I was from, _when_ I was from, but he never...never patted me on the head and reassured me that 'horseless carriages' weren't monsters." His face briefly twisted in disgust.

 

" _Jeez_ , who—"

 

Ted lifted his hand from his stomach and waved it dismissively before dropping it again. "Doesn't matter. The point is, he knew what time I came from, and he never _forgot_ what time I came from, but he still had faith in my abilities. It was...refreshing. ...It was a lot like how _you_ treated me. So yeah, I liked him a lot. But Dan...."

 

Sitting up, Ted scooted back so he was leaning against the wall, bringing his knees up to his chest and loosely wrapping his arms around them. "Do you know what his last words were, Booster?"

 

Surprised by the miserable tone of Ted's voice, Booster walked over and sat down on the other end of the cot. When Ted looked up again, his eyes were wet. "That he loved me," he whispered. "He actually asked someone to tell me. And...I was _using_ him." He ducked his head again, swiping a hand under his nose. "I cared about him but...I didn't _love_ him, I never did. He was just...convenient."

 

Ted took a deep breath and looked at Booster once more. "So I tried to make it up to him. I...took on his name, his legacy, and did my best to honor his memory. Maybe it's stupid but it was all I could think of. I mean, it's not like I could dig him up and say 'I like you, Dan, but not _that_ way.'"

 

There was silence for a few minutes as everything sank in. All the missing pieces that Booster hadn't known even existed. Ted's relief at finally unburdening a secret he hadn't told anyone.

 

"Bea told me you sat by my bed while I was comatose," Ted finally said, quiet and questioning.

 

"Bea?"

 

"Fire. Green hair?"

 

"Oh. I remember, she came to visit a few times."

 

"So it's true?"

 

Booster stared down at the cot, tracing nonsensical patterns on its surface with a finger. "...Yeah. I...."

 

"I never stopped caring about you, Booster," Ted said softly. "I...I still lo— _care_ about you. A lot."

 

"You cared about _Dan_ , too," Booster said stiffly.

 

Ted winced. "I'm trying to retain the last vestiges of my machismo, Booster. Read between the lines."

 

"I'm from the future." Booster crossed his arms over his chest and frowned expectantly at him. "Different taboos. Say what you mean, Ted."

 

Returning the frown for a moment, Ted sighed and mumbled, "I love you, Booster."

 

Booster uncrossed his arms and leaned back on his elbows, smiling. "Ditto."

 

"Gah!" Ted exclaimed, throwing his hands up. "You have got to be the most—" He stopped as Booster suddenly moved toward him, leaning on Ted's knees until they were practically nose to nose.

 

"I love you too, Ted," Booster said, then closed the distance with a light kiss on Ted's lips.

 

"God, Booster, Dan doesn't even _compare_ ," Ted whispered, a dreamy expression on his face.

 

"And the next time you bring him up when I'm kissing you I'll kick your ass."

 

Ted smiled sheepishly. "Deal."

 

There was a nearby slam of a heavy door and the sound of booted feet making their way toward them.

 

"Oh, for joy! I hear our jailer, come to revile and torment us some more!" Ted muttered irritably. "I _do_ so hope that he's brought us another bucket of pig slop for lunch."

 

"Pig slop would be a step _up_ from what they've been feeding us," Booster replied. When he caught sight of a familiar yellow ring on the guard's finger, he smirked as an idea quickly formed in his mind. "Hey dromedary-breath!"

 

Moments later, the guard was out cold, Booster had his Legion flight ring back, and Ted had the guard's gun.

 

Throwing an arm around Ted's shoulders, Booster said, "How about when we get out of here, we get some Chocos and talk things over again."

 

Ted smirked at him. "Oh? You found J'onn's stash?"

 

Booster just grinned and hugged the man close. Under the odor of Bialyan prison, Ted still smelled a little like something had just exploded in his face.

 

It was kind of reassuring to know that some things never changed.


End file.
